That girl sure is cute, right?!
This is what I said to my husband as I pulled up this photo. "Who is that?", he asked. My question had been sarcastic, I mean, IT'S ME!!! Sure it's about five years old now, but still. This particular photo has been in my mind a lot lately. I remember the day. It was a snow day. The kids were off school. I was bored. I put my hair into crazy pigtails, did some big time makeup and then pulled out my camera. "Here...come take pictures of mommy...for myspace." Yes. I've said that on more than one occasion.
That particular journey weight loss, fitness, tattoos, piercings, was a crazy time for me. It became such a part of me, all the fitness and what I thought was healthy eating. Sure we ate better, but I was putting four sweetnlow's in my coffee everyday. Every photo, everything was about ME, who would look at me, who would think I was hot, the attention high is very powerful. Being sexy is time consuming.It's mind consuming. It's also very empty. Let me repeat, very empty.I needed new, cute photos or experiences to fill that void. It was never enough. Eventually life would catch up with me. My husband would face a couple of health crisis', it became too easy to not work out. I'm kind of on the lazy side. The weight didn't come back right away. During this time I became part of two amazing families.The Bethel Baptist Family and God's Family. Both who loved me unconditionally. It didn't matter what I looked like, I was loved. It made it easy to slip into old habits, I mean I didn't need them to love me for what I looked like, they loved me for me. God loved me.
I began to realize everything in life is to be for God's glory. Do we really think overeating is just a part of our life we can keep separate? Needing food more than God is okay? No, it's not.
1 Corinthians 6:13
Food is for the stomach and the stomach is for food, but God will do away with both of them. Yet the body is not for immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord is for the body.
This new gear towards healthy eating is fueled by new motivations. One, I am to glorify God in all that I do. What I eat, why I eat is included. My workouts should be for His glory, not mine. My appearance, should it change (let's hope so, nothing in my closet fits!!) is for God's glory. Not my own. I want to be able to have more energy, more time, more organization to spread the Gospel. Oh yeah, that's right. I need energy for my little helper to arrive soon. Little Ellie and her story will certainly speak to God's glory. I'm also going to need all the energy I can get to take care of her.
Play list five years ago for work out
Kidd Rock
Christina Aguilera
Nickelback
Buckcherry (yeah, THAT song)
Play list for today's workout.
Skillet
Decyfer Down
The Letter Black
Lecrae